From Louis

……………………On this day, December 12th, four years ago at approximately 3:40 in the afternoon my Jac left her earthly body for her final journey to Heaven…..to be with her Mom. When we learned that there was nothing else that could help her….no magic pill….she bravely told me she wanted to “go home to her mom”…..I promised her that I would make her wish come true…………promises made……………promises kept……I have read books about grief and loss, and have come to realize the tears I shed for Jac are…..”sacred tears”….”the deeper the love….the deeper the grief”…….Jac had a book called “Safe Passages” which she wanted with her when she was cremated. Months later I found another copy she had hidden for me to find…..She wisely knew I would need time before I could even open a book like this….She ear marked certain pages…….These are just two of the passages…………….”Rest assured that in her dying, in her flight through darkness toward a new light, she held you in her arms and carried your closeness with her. And when she arrived at God, your image was imprinted on her joy filled soul”………………”I lie in the dark….aware that in the distance…the music of life is playing. Even in my grieving for you, I am drawn to the sounds and my body begins to stir……Your voice, next to me in the night…gives me a little nudge……”Go ahead Dance”…….So I stand up, still clothed in darkness, and held up my arms. A long twirl, a low dip. Silently, I come to life like a marionette who has been touched by magic…..Please don’t give me away…..not yet…..I’m not ready for anyone to know I’m dancing in the darkness”………………..When ever I am at my lowest I reach for this book for a message from Jac, and the page I open to always seems to be just the right message…..of course it is….it’s Jac’s message to me……..I don’t always feel better, but I know Jac is with me and always will be……………..I chose this picture of Jac at sunset on the Island of Anguilla. It was our “HAPPY” place where we were our most relaxed, and just enjoyed and loved being together. When I saw the sun’s setting light on her she was so beautiful, and it was truly heavenly. I had to capture the moment……..I believe I did………Today Lily and Ellie’s ashes [Elizabeth, Margret, Taylor, Dubelle, Dell’Olio] will be joining Jac in the sea….I’ve been saving Ellie’s ashes for so long, but now is the perfect time……….I know they will be happy to be together again, and Jac can spoil them in heaven……………….Another day closer my sweetheart.

………………….As the fourth year of Jac’s passing approaches I think of the promises I made……From the time Jac was a little girl and knew how to read and write she and her mom would exchange cards, notes and letters. Many of the cards Jac made herself. They saved all of them. Over the many years until Jac’s mom passed they kept giving each other these notes and cards. Her mom used to hide them in Jac’s luggage, on her many trips to Europe on modeling jobs, so she would find them. After her mom passed Jac would still find little notes left for her hidden around the house. I wouldn’t be surprised if one day I happen upon a hidden note…..The two cards above were given to Jac by her mom. She used to keep one in her mom’s bible and one in a book called “Safe Passage” by Molly Fumia. They were always at Jac’s bed side. She made me promise that they would be put with her when she was cremated….which I did….but before doing so I took pictures of the cards, because I wanted them too……Jac also made me promise to burn all of her cards, letters, notes and pictures plus her journals and throw the ashes into the sea. She said she couldn’t bare the thought of her loved possessions being thrown into the trash…There are boxes of them…..I promised I would, but I just haven’t had the heart to do it…..not yet………………..Promises made………….promises kept

…………………Everyone NEEDS some MAGIC in their lives today more than ever!!!!! The Radio City Music Hall Extravaganza is just the thing to see!! It’s been decades since I’ve seen a Christmas show at RCMH, and I’ve forgotten just how fantastical it is. As we get older we become a touch more jaded, and may think this show is just for the kiddies, but there is a kid in all of us, and a SPECTACULAR it is.. RCMH is like no other theater in the world…..Just the size of it alone you know you are in for something special. It’s like sitting inside of a globe. Every part of the theater, the walls the ceiling, and the proscenium become part of the production with different moving things constantly projected on them……it even snows on the audience!!! When you enter you are handed 3D glasses, and when Santa instructs you to put them on the fun begins. He goes riding in his sleigh and you go with him for the ride!!! There are so many acts the mind bogles at the visual bombardment. I loved the dancing Santas. Not only were they on the stage but projected dancing all over the theater! Hundreds of them….The special effects were wonderful. The whole thing was amazing. The Nativity scene with the live animals parading onto the stage, the 3 wise men, and Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus made it all very clear what Christmas was all about. Santa’s workshop with the elves, the Nutcracker Suite, and those ROCKETTES were all incredible…….The ROCKETTES did not disappoint…..Their precision and high kicks were right on point, and the orchestra was phenomenal……It was a great afternoon at Radio City Music Hall!

………………….One forgets just what a landmark theater Radio City Music Hall is….The Arte Deco detailing, the grand staircase, the murals on the walls and even the bathrooms are a must see. Of course for Christmas the entire theater is decked out with sparkling wreaths and a gigantic crystal Christmas tree hanging from the ceiling. The lines are long, but there are many of them so they keep moving, and it didn’t take long to get to our assigned seats. You do have to show your ID and vaccination card to get in, and once inside masks are not required….you can’t eat your popcorn, pretzels and cotton candy anyway with a mask on! I went to the show with Cathy who I have worked with for years on my jewelry line, and her sister Nina. Neither one of them have ever been to RCMH…..so it was an experience they will never forget. After seeing it Kathy was shocked she had never taken her three children to see it…………….It’s never too late!

……………………It was cold and crisp, but no wind so it was very comfortable walking around…..After the show we went for a walk around the tree and Rockefeller Center……The skaters were skating, and the MASSES of people were inching about looking at this and that taking lots of pictures and selfies……..There was a distinct odor in the air…….and it wasn’t balsam!!!!The smell of POT was very intrusive….I’m not against pot smoking, and I’ve been known to partake once in a while, but the pungent smell of pot, and the Christmas experience just don’t go together for me…….Give me the smell of a Christmas tree anytime………One thing I was oblivious to, but Kathy and her sister Nina mentioned to me, was the amount of security and police walking about…..even with sniffing German Shepherds! It was now time to eat, so we made our way to the restaurant which was a few minutes walk away!